Running in the Rain

One of my favorite parts of running a race is seeing the photos taken by the race photographers. Usually I look absolutely terrible in these pictures but every once in a while there's a winner. Sometimes I'll even buy a few of the shots when they offer a sale months later. So it makes sense that I just now got around to buying my race photos from the RnR Madrid Half Marathon back in April.

While training for a race in the arid desert climate of Madrid, rain was the last thing I anticipated. (Go ahead with your rain in Spain on the plains jokes, I'll wait.) In my months of training, I hadn't encountered rain once while on a run. So you can imagine my despair when, come race day, the sky was overcast and the rain fell steadily. It let up for the start and I prayed desperately for it to hold off a few more hours. When the heavy rains began pelting me at mile 3, there was no turning back. I was in it for the long haul and I had no choice but to keep moving forward and finish the race. It ended up raining hard for the next ten miles and by the time I crossed the finish line I was completely drenched and rocking the drowned rat look.

I looked something like this.

I've been reflecting on this experience recently as I participate in another race - the race of life. Yes, I know it sounds cheesy but bear with me here. My life as a teacher is divided into four major "races" with visible finish lines. The first race is completing the fall semester and being rewarded with Christmas vacation. The second race is completing the stretch between Christmas and Spring Break, and the third race is like one of those super intense Spartan Sprint 5Ks as we return from Spring Break and barrel towards the biggest finish line of them all: summer vacation. The fourth race is spending the summer raising support to do it all over again the next year. I cross that finish line when I reach 100% of my support for that year.

Sometimes those races go exactly as planned but more often than not, things come up. I trip over surprises like untied shoelaces, and obstacles block my path like potholes in the road. Spiritual attacks strike me from every side like a torrential downpour of rain. Sometimes I have to stop and catch my breath. Sometimes I think about quitting. But every time God gives me the strength to keep moving forward and finish the race.

I've been studying scripture passages about patience and perseverance as I grapple with the latest surprise, Germany's minimum wage law. It is still beyond my understanding how I will raise the rest of my support in the next two weeks. This unexpected spike in support needs has taken me by complete surprise, much in the same way that the rain did on race day.

While reading Romans 5, I was blown away by the Message version.

We continue to shout our praise even when we're hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we're never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary - we can't round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit! (Romans 5:3-5, The Message)

There are so many great images in this passage! Passionate patience. The tempered steel of virtue. Alert expectancy. These are the kinds characteristics that I strive for as I actively wait for God to do a great work in and through and for me. In the meantime I shout my praise to the Lord who is indeed my Everything.



Please join me in praying for this final $565 in monthly support to come in. Pray that it will pour in so fast that I won't be able to "round up enough containers to hold everything" as God generously provides.

If you'd like to participate in God's provision, please visit my personal giving page and sign up to make a monthly gift of any size.

he heard me praying

Blessed be God - he heard me praying. He proved he's on my side; I've thrown my lot in with him. Now I'm jumping for joy, and shouting and singing my thanks to him. (Psalm 28:6-7, The Message)

I've reached the halfway point of my personal work week here in Germany. It has been a whirlwind couple of days for me, and I am thankful for God's grace to allow me to get everything done so far. I am feeling overwhelmed with thanksgiving right now, so I just thought I should share a few of my praises with you.

Thankful moment #1: Knowing that I would need to hit the ground running in Germany, I prayed for good sleep during my long flight. I even bought some ZzzQuil sleep aid pills and took a do on the plane. I was pleasantly surprised by the amount of DEEP sleep I was able to get during the flight and how awake I felt when I deplaned in Zurich on Wednesday morning!

Thankful moment #2: I made it to my new apartment a few hours later and began the task of setting up my phone and wireless router. I had arranged for my service to be moved to the new place while I was away so that it would be functional by the time I arrived. As plugged in all the wires I realized that all my paperwork for the account was at my old apartment and figured I would probably have to go get them in order to set up my new wifi network. On a whim, I opened my computer to see what would happen. Without skipping a beat it connected to my network, Bazinga, and I was surfing the web. WHAT?! If you know anything about phone/internet service in Germany, you will know that it is NEVER this easy.

Thankful moment #3: It had rained for most of Wednesday morning, but I was scheduled to move that afternoon. The rain held off until the very end, and I had a full moving crew of strong friends and former students who worked seemingly effortlessly to transport all my furniture to the new place and even set up my washer and dryer for me! We finished in less than two hours! Because of that I was free to spend the rest of the day unpacking and settling into the new apartment.

Thankful moment #4: On Thursday morning I met a former student and her mom at my old apartment to clean. Thanks to their cheerful and efficient cleaning job, I was able to focus on scrubbing the bathroom while they made the rest of the apartment shine, and all in two hours! All that remained was to defrost the freezer, and I was done with cleaning by noon! That freed me up to spend the rest of the day doing more unpacking/settling in at the new apartment. I also was able to pack two of my three suitcases for Spain and get the rest of my personal effects into the basement for storage.

Thankful moment #5: On Friday morning I met with the BFA housing coordinator and my German landlord to officially check out of the old apartment. The place wasn't in super great shape when we took it over, and because of that there was some damage to the walls and floors that we simply weren't able to fix. Thankfully our landlord is a very understanding and kind man who did not hold us responsible for the damage. There were a lot of things that he probably could have been pretty upset about, but he was gracious and wished me well in Spain.

Thankful moment #6: NO. JETLAG. Yep, you read that right. Did I really cross six time zones?? God knew I needed energy and strength to get all those things done by Friday and I truly believe that He (and my ZzzQuil!) allowed me to sleep soundly. Because I awoke each morning refreshed and well-rested, I was able to get in three full work days and accomplish everything on time.

Thankful moment #7: I HIT 90%!!! Those of you who follow me on Facebook know I had to kick my support campaign into overdrive as I was not adequately funded when I left America on Tuesday. I only had about 73% of my goal and needed to reach 90% to be cleared by TeachBeyond to continue on to Spain. Between new supporters joining my team for the first time and old supporters increasing their giving, my support level jumped to 90% in just two days! PRAISE THE LORD!

Yesterday afternoon the girl subleasing from me this year arrived and I was able to show her around the new apartment, then we both got to meet and talk with our landlords for a bit before we parted ways. It was a strange feeling to have "given away" two apartments in one day and to officially be "homeless" here in Kandern. I actually got a little flutter in my stomach as I pulled out of the driveway, like I was about to embark on a big adventure.

For the remainder of my stay in Kandern I'm staying with my good friends Mike and Kari, who have already been fabulous hosts. This morning I slept in until about 11:00 and entered the kitchen feeling bad about sleeping so late, only to find that I was just in time for crepes and coffee! We took our time, savoring each bite while catching each other up on our summers.

My final task before I can be cleared to depart BFA is to finish updating my curriculum course binders so that they can be passed on to the new science teacher. Today I spent about seven hours at the middle school cleaning up my classroom and office space, and getting my supplies and materials organized.

The supply cabinet is reorganized and ready to go!

Saying farewell to my classroom for awhile ...

Now that everything is in its place, I can focus on finishing my curriculum work. Please pray that I can stay focused and finish this final task quickly! I depart for Spain on Thursday but my goal is to finish this work by Tuesday evening so that I can relax before flying Thursday morning.

Thank you for your prayers and encouragement this week! Before we know it I will be reporting to you from SPAIN!!

quarter three update and prayer needs

Third quarter: past the halfway point and yet still so far away from the finish line. The stretch of time between Christmas break and Easter break is often the longest and hardest part of the school year for both students and teachers. The days seems to simultaneously crawl and fly by, so full of exciting events yet so exhausting. Weekends are quickly snatched up for retreats, conferences, and birthday getaways, and before you know it the cold, dark days of January have given way to the slightly warmer, ever-lengthening days of spring.

One of the best ways to brighten up a dreary winter day is to have a spirit day! The theme was "Candy."

In late February we attended the high school retreat in Nurnberg, Germany. This was a bittersweet weekend for me because it was the last time I will attend with my small group girls. They are only juniors but since I will not be at BFA next year, this is our last year together. During retreat we were refreshed by the worship times and challenged by the speaker to be rooted in the knowledge of Christ.

attempting selfies!

Seventh graders did their big research projects on the human body and presented on the various systems. The digestive system group had a lot of fun with their project and served us "brownies" which we ate with much enthusiasm!

Our next spirit day was "Books."

Katniss Everdeen (The Hunger Games) 

Charlie Brown 

Piglet and Pooh

During the last week of the quarter, sixth graders wrapped up their scientific method unit by presenting their science fair projects. They worked hard to come up with a project idea, plan and execute an experiment, collect and analyze the data, and present their findings to the class. I'm so proud of their hard work on these projects!

And now, I am about to enter the homestretch. We are currently on spring break and classes resume next Wednesday. The two months until graduation honestly terrify me because the end is so near. There is still so much on my list - not only my "to-do" list (the responsibilities I must attend to) but my "bucket list" (the things I want to do before leaving Germany) as well. I am already feeling the temptation to check out but I can't afford to not be 100% present over these next two months. Please join me in praying in the following ways:

1) For financial provision that will enable me to finish this school year. As I wrote a few weeks ago, my support is dangerously low. I honestly do not know where the money will come from to meet the expenses facing me in these last two months, but I do know with certainty that God will meet all my needs.

2) For focus, strength, and good time management as I not only wrap up the school year but pack up and clean my apartment, and work through the "departing staff" checklist for BFA.

3) For positive attitudes and diligence as I work with a team to plan and execute the annual eighth grade class trip. It's hard for me to accept change, and this year involves quite a bit of deviation from "tradition." This will be my fifth year on the trip and I want to see it through fresh eyes this year.

4) For diligence and boldness as I prepare for a summer of support raising so that I may continue to serve in Spain this fall. Pray that God would prepare the hearts of the people who will hear my story, and that I would be able to fully express my vision and heart for the TCKs in my care. Pray that God would provide miraculously through His people.

5) For logistics related to my transition from Germany to Spain. Visa paperwork, housing arrangements, and flight plans are just a few of the things that are causing me a lot of stress right now.

6) For healthy ways to manage my stress levels, which will hopefully keep my blood pressure down. I return to the doctor in June (perhaps the most stressful month of the year) for the final follow-up appointment to determine whether I will need to begin taking medication for hypertension. Pray especially that my blood pressure would remain low and that the doctor would get accurate readings.

I can't express how thankful I am for each and every one of you. Your prayers, your notes of encouragement, your generous financial gifts, and your interest in my students means the world to me and I would not be here today without you! THANK YOU!!

for crying out loud

I'm really bad at asking for help. At some point I got it into my head that I needed to be strong and independent, but somewhere along the line I became a little too independent. It's interesting, then, that I have chosen a lifestyle that relies on my ability to ask for help and live on the generosity of those around me.

It's also interesting that the concept of "crying out for help" has come up several times in my Bible studies over the last few months. It started with a sermon at church about the story of Jesus walking out to the disciples on the water and Peter asking Jesus to call him out of the boat. While a lot of people give Peter flack for his doubt and subsequent sinking, my pastor made a good point that I'd never thought of before: The reason he was even able to sink was because he got out of the boat! Not only that, but he asked Jesus to call him out of the boat. For some reason that struck a chord with me as I compared myself to Peter. Now I've never walked on the Rhein River but once upon a time I asked God to send me into the world, and in faith I stepped out of my comfortable boat into an ocean of foreign languages and cultural adjustments and homesickness and a bunch of crazy teenagers that make my life worth living. And like Peter, when I take my eyes off of Jesus I begin to sink -- not into the ocean but into anxiety, selfishness, and insecurity. Many also speculate on why Jesus let Peter sink. Couldn't he have just let Peter walk on water? Sure, but if he had, would Peter have truly placed his confidence in Jesus? Or would he have taken the credit for this little "miracle"? I think that Peter needed to cry out to Jesus and remember where his strength was coming from. He also needed to see firsthand that Jesus would hear and answer his cries.

In the days following that sermon, I got the unsettling sense that God was getting ready to bring me to a place where I would have no choice but to call out to Him to deliver me.

A few weeks later during my Beth Moore study on the life of David, the idea of crying out to God came up again. One thing I've really enjoyed during this study is the ability to look at the actual events in 1-2 Samuel, then read what was going through David's mind in the psalms that he wrote. David cried out to the Lord multiple times to deliver him from the hand of his enemies, which He did. Beth Moore wrote, "God could rescue us with or without our cry for help." So why, then, must we call on Him before He rescues us? She raises a very interesting question. The more I've thought about it, the more I am convinced that before I can truly appreciate God's hand in my life, I have to first be willing to admit that I need it. As long as I can take care of things on my own then I don't need to ask for help. The very act of asking is admitting that I can't do it on my own. I have to lay down my pride and place myself in God's hand before He can truly help me. Furthermore, when I surrender control and place my life in God's hands I have no choice but to give Him the glory for what happens next.

Over the last several weeks God has given me plenty of opportunities to put this new idea into practice, most notably last week when I received an email from TeachBeyond informing me that due to the balance of my account, my monthly "salary" is being reduced -- by about 20%. Once again I find myself dangerously close to being sent home just a few months before the school year is over.

I'll tell you a secret: raising support is not fun, enjoyable, or easy. In fact, it's the most stressful part of my job. There's so much pressure when your entire life is on display, and it's tempting to turn it into a display of my own strength and abilities. It's hard sometimes to keep the right perspective. But it's the life I have chosen for myself and the only way that I am able to serve my Who. After five years of struggling through the highs and lows of this life, I've come to the conclusion that it's not supposed to be easy. If it were, then I could take credit for it myself and no doubt forget to praise the One who truly deserves the credit. Because of the struggle, I am forced to truly humble myself before Him before He can help me, otherwise I'll continue operating under the delusion that I am enough and that I can take care of myself.

So now that I've cried out to Jesus and accepted that I can't do this without Him, I cry out to you, my friends and supporters. The reality of my current situation is that my support account is about to go into the negative -- or already has, as my month-end statement will probably show up as this posts. I am checking my mailbox every day for my German tax bill, which I was told will be in the neighborhood of about 2,000 Euro. I am in desperate need of new monthly supporters in order to finish this school year and move on to Spain this fall. I am going to have to pay all my bills here in Germany for the month of July while I am in America. My five-year old computer has reached the end of its lifespan and I can't afford to buy a new one. There are a lot more stressors on my mind right now but these are the most pressing. It's hard not to despair. God has brought me to a place of complete and utter dependence on Him, and now I humbly seek His provision through you. Many of you are already giving generously and I can't ask you to do more. However, if you are reading this and are not currently partnering with me financially, would you consider praying about becoming a monthly supporter or one-time gifter?

I\d like to end this post by sharing with you two songs that have been on repeat over the last few weeks. The first one, Faithful, is a beautiful reminder of how I can trust God with my future because of what He's done with my past. The second, Lift My Life Up, is a response to God's faithfulness. When I acknowledge who God is my only response is complete and total surrender.

thankful thursday

This week I'm thankful for:

• Reaching 94%! Support levels jumped over the weekend and I was permitted to fly to Germany on Monday. I landed Tuesday evening and jumped right into my responsibilities here on Wednesday - teacher's conference in the morning followed by work at the middle school in the afternoon all this week!
• Uneventful travel. Flying out of Cleveland really stinks. My flight is always delayed or canceled. This time around was no different, but thankfully this time I made my connecting flights to London and Basel.
• Free luggage allowance. Flying on missionary airfare with British Airways means you get three free checked bags. I was warned that since my return flight originated with American Airlines, that I would only receive one free bag. Then my awesome grandma loaded me up with a ton of really useful school supplies and I made plans to check two suitcases and pay for the extra one. That would leave me with a carry-on suitcase and a backpack. So when I checked in I explained my situation and asked about the possibility of checking multiple bags. The ticket agent gladly checked both large suitcases plus my small carry-on suitcase for free! All I had to carry on the plane was my backpack and I didn't have to pay for the checked bags!

hello monday

Hello Monday.

Hello insane day of blessings. You can bet I'll have a lot to share on Thankful Thursday this week.

Hello 94%! I am so excited! God has done amazing things in the past few weeks and I am so humbled by all that he's done to bring me this far. All that remains is $120/month!

Hello free airport wi-fi. Without you I would have nothing to do for the next hour and a half while waiting for my flight.
Hello Chicago, London, and Basel. "Today" I will visit all three of you, even if it will only be airport visits. I am not looking forward to the long layover in London, but at least I will be in an English-speaking airport.

Hello jet lag. You will strike soon, but I will vanquish you this time!

we are go for launch: 90% and what it means

Let's start with some fabulous news: This week I reached 90.9%! This means TeachBeyond will allow me to fly back to Germany on Monday as planned. Praise the Lord!! After moving my flight from the 6th to the 20th, I was excited about having two extra weeks in America with my family, but at the same time I was anxious about losing two weeks of valuable classroom and lesson prep time. As the days passed and my support status leveled out at 83%, I honestly began to wonder if I would be forced to delay my departure a second time. Doing so would cause me to miss the beginning of teacher's conference, which of course brought me a bit of anxiety. I clung to the promise that God would be faithful to keep His promises, but I was legitimately worried. But, things change quickly and in one day it jumped from 83% to the coveted 90%!

So here's the deal: I am still in need of $200 in monthly support in order to be fully funded. While I have been cleared to fly, I have not reached 100%.  Of course I would love to reach 100% before my plane lifts off Monday afternoon, and the exciting thing is, it's totally possible! All that remains is TEN individuals or families willing to commit $20 a month, EIGHT individuals or families willing to commit $25 a month, FOUR individuals or families willing to commit $50 a month, or TWO individuals or families willing to give $100 a month!

So what do you think? Wouldn't you like to partner with me and become involved in the incredible ministry of Black Forest Academy? If so, visit the TeachBeyond website right now and sign up to become a monthly supporter. You can do so much more than simply put me on a plane. Your support can help students like Sophie, Joyce, and so many others to receive a quality international Christian education at BFA!

If you are unable to offer financial support, please join me in praying that the last 20% will come in quickly!

still

Waiting for another $350 in monthly support.
Waiting for people to stand behind me.
Waiting for clearance to fly on Monday.
Waiting for God to reveal just what it is He's trying to teach me through this.

Trying to communicate the passion I have for serving the students at Black Forest Academy.
Trying to express why it matters.
Trying to find people willing to give cheerfully and sacrificially.
Trying to reach 100% - something I've never been able to do.

Watching God do miraculous things for my fellow support raisers.
Wondering when it will be my turn.
Wanting to be happy for them.
Wishing I weren't jealous of their blessings.

I haven't written my regular weekly posts because there is nothing new to say. I've said everything I know to say, and done everything I know to do, and still I've fallen short. $350 a month short. I am not enough, but God is, and from here on out, it's all Him. I have already had to delay my departure by two weeks and even that wasn't enough. If I don't leave on Monday, I will miss the beginning of my responsibilities - staff meetings and valuable work days necessary for preparing for the start of school.

If you feel led to partner with me financially this year so that I can return to Germany and to my ministry to the students of Black Forest Academy, please visit this page and sign up today to become a monthly supporter (be sure to specify that your gift is for me). I promise, you will not regret it.

five things {you can do} friday

Yes, I've taken a break from blogging this week. No, I haven't fallen off the face of the earth. This week was supposed to be spent setting up my new apartment and working on lesson plans and classroom decorations. Instead, I have spent it in America trying to finish raising the support I need to return to Germany on August 20th. There hasn't been much to report on, since I have been stuck at 83% since Sunday. So today, I want to share with you five things you can do to support the work I do at BFA and help me get back to Germany on time.

{1} Sign up to become a monthly supporter. At the time of writing this post, I still need $350/month to be fully funded. Any amount you are willing to share so that I can serve at BFA will make a difference. Your gift does not have to be huge to be helpful. During my first year, my elementary-aged cousin gave me $1 a month. You can bet that made a difference.

{2} Make a one time or annual gift. Special gifts send to TeachBeyond on my behalf are saved up and used for many things - airfare for home assignment, reimbursement of ministry expenses, emergencies, and even going to cover any monthly support that doesn't come in. Last year about 50% of my monthly support came from one-time gifts.

{3} Buy my jewelry. All the items in my Etsy shop are handmade by me and all the sales go towards covering miscellaneous expenses related to living in Germany. In the past I've used Etsy sales to cover my Skype subscription for calling home, to put gas in my car, and to buy snacks and gifts for my small group girls.

{4} Tell a friend. My circle of contacts is only so big, and there are only so many people I can ask. Social networking sites like Facebook and Blogger have helped me reach outside my own personal circle, but you, my friend, are my best advocate. If you know me personally or have followed this blog for any length of time, then you know the heart and passion I have for my students and the work I do at BFA, and you can tell others about that. Is there someone in your own circle that would enjoy hearing my story, or consider joining my support team because you recommended it?

{5} Pray. Pray that I would continue to trust and have peace in God's provision. Pray that God would bring to my attention the right people to approach about financial support. Pray that the ones God calls to give will be obedient. Pray that God's power and faithfulness be evident throughout this whole process.

 

hello monday

Hello Monday. You were supposed to be the Monday that I flew back to Germany but alas, God has other plans. But it's ok, I'm confident that I will only see two more of you before I do get to fly!

Hello new week. Instead of spending you in my new apartment fighting jetlag and working on my classroom, I will get to spend you in America finishing up my support raising and enjoying my family.

Hello jogging. You and I have had an on-again, off-again relationship and it's time to be on again. Starting tomorrow. No, really. I just signed up to run the 7K in the Basel Marathon again, and this time I'm actually going to prepare for it. Last year's run almost killed me and I have no intention of finishing last this year.

Still alive after the run that almost killed me ... (September 2012)

Hello packing. I know I have two weeks to spend working on you, but I figure I should probably get started, seeing as how I have a tendency to procrastinate.

50 states of support: week five update

Whoohoo! This week I jumped from 65% to 80%! Join me in celebrating!

Unfortunately, 80% is not enough to fly, so the big announcement is that my flight has been delayed by two weeks so that I can have ample time to find the other 20% that I need to be fully funded. On the one hand, I'm bummed because I'm ready to start getting my classroom ready for the new year, and I'm ready to start lesson planning, but I can't do that from another continent. On the other hand, I'm really excited to have two more unexpected weeks in America to spend with my family. This summer will have been the longest amount of time I've gotten to spend in America and with my family since I left for Germany three years ago.

So, please join me in both praising God for His provision this week, and in praying that the other 20% will come in quickly. And if you are someone who has been thinking about joining my support team and have yet to commit, PLEASE pray about it and get in touch with me as soon as possible to let me know your thoughts. I would love to answer any questions you have or tell you more personally about my ministry at BFA.

You can sign up today to become a monthly supporter by visiting TeachBeyond's page and either downloading the form to mail in, or submitting your info online.

thankful thursday

This week I'm thankful for:

• A jump of 15% in monthly support this week! As I write this post I'm at 80%!! I don't have a new map to show you, though, because I did not receive any new pledges yesterday.
• Life. It's a shame when it's lost unexpectedly. We are grieving with a family friend this week.
• The generosity of a family friend that allows me to have one more big yard sale this weekend. Even if it does mean I have to do all the work by myself since my parents can't get the time off from work and my brother, who isn't working, inexplicably has no time for me anymore.
• Good times with friends. Last weekend we had a family from church over for lunch and a Ticket to Ride party and we had a blast. I have also finally met my matches - I didn't win a single game that day!!
• Kool-Aid. Sounds crazy, but I've been sipping it all week and it reminds me of the summers of my childhood, when the biggest question I had to answer was whether or not I would ride my bike or play the Nintendo that day.

duke and his cookies

This summer I've LOVED getting to spend tons of time with Duke, my parents' pup. In the mornings before I wake up, he will climb into my bed and snuggle up beside me, and he follows me around the house all day. At the beginning of the summer we were going for walk/jogs around the block, before the humidity reached terrifying heights. He's a quirky little guy, and he looooves his cookies (dog treats). Here's a little bit of what he was up to yesterday. I can't stop laughing when I watch this clip - he is VERY excited about his cookies!!

Yesterday I hit 80%!! There are only 20 states left to claim, which equals $400 in monthly support still needed for me to be fully funded. I am so amazed at how God has been working this week to bring in my support!! Check out the most updated map - all the red states are new!!

There's still time, friends. If you want to get involved and support the work that I do at Black Forest Academy, please visit TeachBeyond's page today and sign up to become a monthly supporter. You could make a valuable contribution to furthering God's work among the nations (aka, my students!!).